I’ve paused for a long time in blogging and is just recovering now. Sadly, it seems that I have to take a rest on something else just when I decided to start blogging again. This time, I am on cosplay hiatus. T^T I’ve cancelled two consecutive cosplans already and is about to cancel another one more. This makes me very sad, really. But I do not feel confident about my body type as of now — which is the main reason why I would want to stop for a while.
I was never slim. I never reached that point in a girl’s ife. I’ve always been the chubby one in our group, the size large, the one who cannot risk renting costumes online because majority are for slim girls. And the one time I did, I looked like a banana leave-wrapped rice cake. But it never bothered me then. Just as long as I can cosplay with my friends, being the largest among the group is not that big of a matter.
Until the time came that we are to cosplay separately. My confidence somehow dropped low. Moreso, I gained more weight since I started working maybe because I can finally afford to buy my favorite food this time. Haha.
Going back, I cancelled my long ago planned cosplays mainly because of my figure. Sad as it may seem but for me it serves as a challenge for myself. It may be contradicting to other people’s opinion because we all know that cosplay requires no size frame nor gender nor race just as long as you enjoy the craft responsibly.
I hope anybody who reads this could grasp my point that I am not stopping cosplay because I hate my body. I am stopping cosplay because I am challenging myself to be the better me. Because in all honesty, I really gained a lot of weight since day 1 of my cosplay and I would want to at least bring back that figure to be able to wear my past costumes.
I will surely miss cosplaying. The people I cosplay with and the preparations we do every upcoming convention day.
I can only wish that in a few months or so, I will look back at this post and tell myself that this moment that I decided to take a rest is the right decision to improve myself. I am hoping that starting from this day, from this post, my motivation to lose weight will never fade until I can use my old costumes again.
Before I end this post, just a short message to chubby girls like me out there:
Our body type will never ever define our beauty. Some are blessed with small waist, thigh gaps and colar bones while we are blessed with this lovely curves and there is nothing wrong with both. Let us look at the similarity rather than the difference because slim or chubby, we are all blessed. That is a fact that is too often missed out. It is on how we appreciate this blessing that counts.
Personally , I just want to challenge myself that’s why I am doing this. Besides, I will never be slim at all though because that is not the body type that I am born with. I just want to live healthier and bring back my favorite cosplays just as before.